There is some funny twin mama humour which answers the numerous times someone says “two for the price of one” to us with “the only thing my twins have shared is their birthday and my uterus”!
This is why we have a lot of toys, many of them in matching pairs so that Biscuit and Cracker can have one each. Of course the big things, like the toy kitchen and play tent, they share and other things they get their own version, like Biscuit has Toy Story’s Jessie and Cracker has Woody. It is the smaller things, the trains and teddies etc, that we buy two exactly the same.
So how do they know whose is whose? They may be twins, but I still want them to know that they have things of their own. I never want them to feel that they’re interchangeable, or that they don’t get personal property as they are one of a pair. Some things (and here is where the people who hate gender stereotyping may object) we get in blue and pink. From an early age they could recognise whose sippy cup it is, or whose bib as Cracker always had the blue one and Biscuit always had the pink. Don’t blame me on the colour- manufacturers generally do blue, pink and one gender-neutral colour like green or cream!
Other things are harder as they are identical. This can cause issues. I started writing their initials on things, but they can’t yet read (slackers) so I added a picture- a star for Cracker and a heart for Biscuit. They picked that up straight away and will look for the mark of their toys or beakers and, more importantly, will swap if they’ve picked up the wrong one.
I love them being twinkles, but I also embrace their individuality and own personalities. I see them as two sides of the same coin- totally different to look at and feel, but a part of a bigger whole as well.